Sesame Street Beat

"Burt could only take the heckling so long," said Mr. Hooper, friend and coworker. "The never ending barage of questions regarding his relationship with Ernie must have finally gotten to him."

After a night of heavy drinking and recreational drug use at a local strip club, Burt allegedly boiled over and attacked a member of the paparazzi before getting into his limo. Witnesses on the scene could not explain how the television star, who reportedly stands only 24 inches tall and has no legs, attacked the photographer. "It was just a flurry of fuzzy yellowish fur and red, blue, and green stripes. We couldn't really see what was happening," stated one bystander, "The photographer screamed right up until someone in Burt's entourage grabbed him by that tuft of hair on his peak and pulled him away."

Upon learning of the charges, the letter D and the number 8 pulled their sponsorship from the program, and several producers questioned his future involvement in the show. Ernie did not immediately return calls seeking comment.

additional reporting by news staffer Nate Doyle